\u00dcsk\u00fcdar \u00dcniversitesi NP\u0130STANBUL Hastanesi Klinik Psikolog \u0130pek Erol, ki\u015finin kendine iltifat etmesinin, \u00f6zsayg\u0131 ve psikolojik dayan\u0131kl\u0131l\u0131k \u00fczerindeki etkilerinden bahsetti.<\/p>\n
Kendi de\u011ferlerini g\u00f6rmek, psikolojik dengeyi korumay\u0131 kolayla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131r!<\/strong><\/p>\n Son y\u0131llarda sosyal medyada en \u00e7ok kar\u015f\u0131la\u015f\u0131lan \u00f6nerilerden birinin \u2018her g\u00fcn aynaya bak ve kendine g\u00fczel \u015feyler s\u00f6yle\u2019 \u015feklinde oldu\u011funu hat\u0131rlatan Klinik Psikolog \u0130pek Erol, \u201cKimileri bunun \u00f6zg\u00fcveni art\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 savunuyor, kimileri ise \u2018\u0130nsan kendini \u00f6v\u00fcnce ger\u00e7ekten daha iyi hisseder mi?\u2019 diye soruyor. Asl\u0131nda bu tart\u0131\u015fma yeni de\u011fil.\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n Psikoloji biliminin uzun y\u0131llard\u0131r insan\u0131n kendisiyle kurdu\u011fu i\u00e7 diyalo\u011fun ruh sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00fczerindeki etkisini ara\u015ft\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 aktaran Erol, \u201cBug\u00fcn elimizdeki bulgular, kendine iltifat etmenin san\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan daha karma\u015f\u0131k bir s\u00fcre\u00e7 oldu\u011funu g\u00f6steriyor. Psikoloji literat\u00fcr\u00fcnde bu yakla\u015f\u0131m \u00e7o\u011funlukla \u00f6z-onaylama (self-affirmation) kavram\u0131yla a\u00e7\u0131klan\u0131r. \u00d6z-onaylama, ki\u015finin kendisini abart\u0131l\u0131 bi\u00e7imde \u00f6vmesi anlam\u0131na gelmez. Daha \u00e7ok, kendi de\u011ferlerini, g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc y\u00f6nlerini ve ya\u015fam\u0131ndaki anlaml\u0131 rolleri hat\u0131rlayabilme becerisini ifade eder. \u0130nsan, ele\u015ftirildi\u011finde, ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131z oldu\u011funda ya da zorlay\u0131c\u0131 bir ya\u015fam olay\u0131yla kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131nda benlik alg\u0131s\u0131 sars\u0131labilir. \u0130\u015fte bu noktada ki\u015fi, yaln\u0131zca eksiklerine de\u011fil, sahip oldu\u011fu de\u011ferlere de bakabildi\u011finde psikolojik dengesini korumas\u0131 kolayla\u015f\u0131r.\u201d \u015feklinde konu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n Ki\u015finin kendisiyle kurdu\u011fu dil de\u011fi\u015ftik\u00e7e, olaylar\u0131 de\u011ferlendirme bi\u00e7imi de de\u011fi\u015febiliyor!\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Ki\u015finin kendisine s\u00f6yledi\u011fi s\u00f6zlerin yaln\u0131zca moral verici c\u00fcmlelerden ibaret olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131, beynin bu s\u00fcrece biyolojik olarak da yan\u0131t verdi\u011finin bilindi\u011fine de\u011finen\u00a0\u0130pek Erol, \u201c\u00d6zellikle kendimizle ilgili ger\u00e7ek\u00e7i ve olumlu de\u011ferlendirmeler yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda, \u00f6d\u00fcl sistemiyle ili\u015fkili beyin b\u00f6lgelerinde aktivitenin artt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6steren \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmalar bulunuyor. Ayn\u0131 zamanda duygu d\u00fczenleme s\u00fcre\u00e7lerinde g\u00f6rev alan prefrontal b\u00f6lgelerin daha etkin \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131, stres kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda ise savunucu tepkilerin azalabildi\u011fi g\u00f6steriliyor. Ba\u015fka bir ifadeyle, ki\u015finin kendisiyle kurdu\u011fu dil de\u011fi\u015ftik\u00e7e, olaylar\u0131 de\u011ferlendirme bi\u00e7imi de de\u011fi\u015febiliyor.\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n Olumlu i\u00e7 konu\u015fma ile kendine iltifat etmeyi birbirinden ay\u0131rmak gerekti\u011fini dile getiren Erol, \u201cOlumlu i\u00e7 konu\u015fma, ki\u015finin kendisiyle kurdu\u011fu yap\u0131c\u0131 diyalo\u011fun genel ad\u0131d\u0131r. \u2018\u015eu an zorlan\u0131yorum ama bunun \u00fcstesinden gelebilirim\u2019 ya da \u2018hata yapt\u0131m, bunu telafi edebilirim\u2019 gibi ifadeler bu gruba girer. Kendine iltifat etmek ise daha \u00e7ok ki\u015finin kendi \u00e7abas\u0131n\u0131, davran\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 veya karakter \u00f6zelliklerini takdir etmesini i\u00e7erir. \u2018Bug\u00fcn sab\u0131rl\u0131 davrand\u0131m\u2019, \u2018bu i\u015f i\u00e7in ger\u00e7ekten emek verdim\u2019 gibi c\u00fcmleler buna \u00f6rnektir. Aradaki fark k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck gibi g\u00f6r\u00fcnse de psikolojik a\u00e7\u0131dan \u00f6nemlidir. \u0130lki ki\u015fiyi gelece\u011fe haz\u0131rlarken, ikincisi ki\u015finin kendisiyle kurdu\u011fu ili\u015fkinin niteli\u011fini g\u00fc\u00e7lendirir.\u201d diye konu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n Ki\u015finin kendisini yaln\u0131zca sonu\u00e7 \u00fczerinden de\u011ferlendirmemesi gerekir!\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Bu yakla\u015f\u0131m\u0131n etkili olabilmesi i\u00e7in dikkat edilmesi gereken noktalar oldu\u011funa i\u015faret eden Erol, \u015funlar\u0131 s\u00f6yledi:<\/p>\n \u201c\u00d6ncelikle kullan\u0131lan ifadelerin ger\u00e7ek ya\u015fant\u0131ya dayanmas\u0131 gerekir. Ki\u015finin hi\u00e7 sahip olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00f6zellikleri kendisine y\u00fcklemesi, sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 bir \u00f6z de\u011ferlendirme olu\u015fturmaz. Buna kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck de olsa g\u00f6sterdi\u011fi \u00e7abay\u0131 fark edebilmesi \u00e7ok daha g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc bir etki yarat\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u00f6zsayg\u0131y\u0131 besleyen \u015fey yaln\u0131zca ba\u015far\u0131 de\u011fildir; emek, kararl\u0131l\u0131k, sab\u0131r ve yeniden deneme cesareti de benlik alg\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6nemli par\u00e7alar\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n \u0130kinci olarak, ki\u015finin kendisini yaln\u0131zca sonu\u00e7 \u00fczerinden de\u011ferlendirmemesi gerekir. G\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde bir\u00e7ok insan ba\u015far\u0131l\u0131 oldu\u011funda bunu \u2018zaten olmas\u0131 gereken\u2019 diye k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcmserken, en k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck hatas\u0131n\u0131 kimli\u011finin tamam\u0131na mal edebiliyor. Oysa psikolojik a\u00e7\u0131dan daha dengeli olan yakla\u015f\u0131m, davran\u0131\u015f\u0131 ki\u015filikten ay\u0131rabilmektir. Ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131z bir sunum yapmak, ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131z bir insan olmak anlam\u0131na gelmez. Ayn\u0131 \u015fekilde ba\u015far\u0131l\u0131 olmak da insan\u0131 kusursuz yapmaz.\u201d<\/p>\n Sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 bir i\u00e7 konu\u015fma, ne eksikleri g\u00f6rmezden gelir ne de yaln\u0131zca kusurlara odaklan\u0131r!\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n \u2018Kendine iltifat etmek, kendini kand\u0131rmak anlam\u0131na gelir mi?\u2019 sorusunun s\u0131k\u00e7a soruldu\u011funu kaydeden\u00a0Klinik Psikolog \u0130pek Erol, \u201cYan\u0131t b\u00fcy\u00fck \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcde ki\u015finin ger\u00e7eklikle kurdu\u011fu ili\u015fkiye ba\u011fl\u0131d\u0131r. Sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 bir i\u00e7 konu\u015fma, ne eksikleri g\u00f6rmezden gelir ne de yaln\u0131zca kusurlara odaklan\u0131r.\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n \u0130nsan\u0131n, g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc y\u00f6nlerini kabul ederken geli\u015fmesi gereken alanlar\u0131 da ink\u00e2r etmemesi gerekti\u011fine vurgu yapan Erol, \u201cKendini kand\u0131rmak ise ger\u00e7ekli\u011fi \u00e7arp\u0131tmakla ba\u015flar. S\u00fcrekli kusursuz oldu\u011funu s\u00f6ylemek de, s\u00fcrekli yetersiz oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmek de ayn\u0131 \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcde ger\u00e7eklikten uzakla\u015fabilir. Ruh sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan \u00f6nemli olan, ki\u015finin kendisini u\u00e7larda de\u011fil, oldu\u011fu h\u00e2liyle de\u011ferlendirebilmesidir.\u201d a\u00e7\u0131klamas\u0131n\u0131 yapt\u0131.<\/p>\n Kendine adil davranan ki\u015finin \u00f6zsayg\u0131s\u0131 d\u0131\u015f onaya daha az ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 olur!\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Klinik uygulamalarda bu beceriyi geli\u015ftirmek isteyen ki\u015filere uzun listeler yerine k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131klar \u00f6nerildi\u011fini aktaran Erol, \u201cG\u00fcn sonunda birka\u00e7 dakika ay\u0131r\u0131p \u2018Bug\u00fcn hangi davran\u0131\u015f\u0131mdan memnunum?\u2019, \u2018Bug\u00fcn hangi konuda emek verdim?\u2019 ya da \u2018Yak\u0131n bir arkada\u015f\u0131m ayn\u0131 \u015feyi yapsayd\u0131 ona ne s\u00f6ylerdim?\u2019 sorular\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmek bile zamanla ki\u015finin kendisine y\u00f6nelik bak\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirebilir. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc bir\u00e7ok insan ba\u015fkalar\u0131na g\u00f6sterdi\u011fi anlay\u0131\u015f\u0131 kendisinden esirger.\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n Kendine iltifat etmenin, kusurlar\u0131 g\u00f6rmezden gelmek olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7izen Erol, s\u00f6zlerini \u015f\u00f6yle tamamlad\u0131:<\/p>\n \u201cAs\u0131l mesele, ki\u015finin kendi eme\u011fini fark etmeyi \u00f6\u011frenebilmesidir. Ruh sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00fc\u00e7lendiren \u015fey, s\u00fcrekli olumlu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak de\u011fil; ba\u015far\u0131y\u0131 da hatay\u0131 da ayn\u0131 ger\u00e7ek\u00e7ilikle de\u011ferlendirebilmektir. \u0130nsan kendisine kar\u015f\u0131 daha adil davranabildi\u011finde, \u00f6zsayg\u0131 d\u0131\u015far\u0131dan gelen onaylara daha az ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 h\u00e2le gelir. Belki de kendimize s\u00f6yleyebilece\u011fimiz en k\u0131ymetli iltifat, \u2018m\u00fckemmel de\u011fildim ama elimden geleni yapt\u0131m\u2019 c\u00fcmlesidir. \u00c7o\u011fu zaman iyile\u015fme tam da bu noktada ba\u015flar.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n Kaynak: (BYZHA) Beyaz Haber Ajans\u0131<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" \u00dcsk\u00fcdar \u00dcniversitesi NP\u0130STANBUL Hastanesi Klinik Psikolog \u0130pek Erol, ki\u015finin kendine iltifat etmesinin, \u00f6zsayg\u0131 ve psikolojik dayan\u0131kl\u0131l\u0131k \u00fczerindeki etkilerinden bahsetti.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":143,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-142","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-saglik"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/142","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=142"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/142\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":144,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/142\/revisions\/144"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/143"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=142"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=142"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paparazzimagazin.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=142"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}